I'm Here
by Katiebugg88
Summary: Hey everyone! Hope you all enjoy reading this first chapter. This is a fanfiction based around Jax and Tara's life. Hope you like it as much I did writing it. My starting point is season finale of season 6. Please leave comments with any feed back. Thanks from reading!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Tara was at a loss. She stared expressionlessly out the window while driving home. Feeling the tears cloud her vision and the lump building in her throat, she let out a deep breath. Her mind racing, trying to piece the thoughts together from the past few days. Seeing Jax in bed with another woman. Her stomach turned at the thought of it as she tightened her grip around the steering wheel, feeling the sting in both hands. She looked down at her swollen and bruised knuckles. She could not shake the image from her mind. Jackson Teller was the _only_ man Tara had ever truly loved. Their connection and passion for each other was undeniable. But was it enough to salvage their marriage from all the bullshit they'd been through?

She shrugged, quickly wiping away the tears that had slipped out and brought her focus back to the road as she pulled into the driveway. Unser's truck was parked in front of the house. She wondered what he'd be doing there. Wondered if he caught wind about the deal Jax made with Patterson. News seemed to travel pretty quickly in the small town of Charming.

 _Save our sons_. Jax's words kept playing in her head, over and over as she made her way to the front door. That's all she has ever wanted out of this mess. And now, Jax had made a deal for her to do just that. Tara felt the relief rush through her once again, easing her mind from everything else going on. Knowing that she could take their boys out of Charming and raise them, away from all the chaos of the club and everything attached to it.

Tara twisted open the handle and walked into the house. Closing the door behind her, she looked around for Unser.

"Wayne?" She called out, but no response. Sighing in exhaustion, Tara made her way to the couch in the living room and plopped down. Laying her head back, she closed her eyes. All she could see was Jax's face. She replayed their recent moments in the hotel through her mind. Her heart rate and breathing picked up at those thoughts. What he was doing for her and their boys. They both knew it was the best thing. But Tara couldn't help but wonder, _what about us?_ _Where do we go from here?_ She could feel the tears flooding back and her body begin to tremble. She looked down at her wedding ring on her shaky hand. She reached and slid it off her finger, staring at it. As she leaned over and put it in her purse, she saw the .38 revolver sticking out. Just as she picked it up, she heard shuffling footsteps in the kitchen.

Startled, Tara jumped up off the couch and tucked the revolver in the back of the waist band of her jeans, again, wiping away the tears from her cheeks. She could feel them getting swollen and puffy. Shrugging at the thought of Unser's relentless questions, she made her way to the door way of the kitchen.

"Hey Wayne. Look I-" Tara froze midsentence as she stood and stared at her mother-in-law, Gemma Teller on the other side of the kitchen.

Gemma was looking rough. Bloodshot eyes, could barely hold her balance as she leaned her arm against the counter for a moment. _Oh what a surprise, high and drunk, as usual_. She could smell the vodka from the other side if the room. Tara could feel her heart racing and palms sweating, breath starting to stagger. She thought to reach back for the gun initially, but hesitated. All at once, Gemma was across the room to Tara, raising her fist to swing. Just as her hand connected to Tara's cheek; the voice of Eli Roosevelt stopped the brawl in its tracks.

"Gemma! What the hell are you doing?!" Eli cried out. Tara was down on the ground with Gemma over top of her. Juice followed behind Roosevelt, his eyes wide in surprise.

"Holy shit, Gemma." Juice said calmly. He rushes to her side to help her up.

"I got it Juice." She snaps at him. Juice backs away with his hands up in defeat. Gemma stumbles to her feet, shaky and breathing heavily. Eli, still standing behind Tara, helps her up. The rage in both of their faces is evident. Eli nor Juice had any idea what was going on between them. After a moment of silence, Tara speaks up.

"Are you fucking kidding me Gemma? What the hell is your problem?" She felt her cheek burning and swelling already. _Well, this is going to leave a mark_. Tara wasn't too surprised it had come to this. After the pregnancy lie, she knew Gemma wouldn't go down without a fight. She also thought Gemma of all people would understand her reasoning. Protecting her family. Gemma was all about family.

"Don't act so surprised, sweetheart." Gemma said slyly, crossing her arms while leaning against the kitchen table to keep her from falling over. "You think you can just keep my grandbabies from me anytime you want? That's not how this works. I am there grandmother! I have a right to see them." Gemma's voice was harsh and hostile, which fueled Tara's rage.

"Well is it any wonder? Jesus Christ, look at you! Your eyes are glassy and bloodshot and you can barely stand straight. You do not have any rights to my sons. Clean yourself up, Gemma." Tara's eyes burned into Gemma's. She could feel the heated anger radiating from her body from head to toe, her fists clenched, and jaw tighten. _Who the hell does she think she is_?! Gemma kept her head down, now practically slumping over the kitchen table. Tara could tell she got under her skin from her silence. Eli and Juice could feel the tension in the air, both unsure of what either of these women were capable of at this point. Juice's phone started ringing as he reached for it from his pocket. It was Jax. Juice knew Jax would want to know about this and he needed to stay on his good side as best he could at this point.

"I gotta take this. You okay with these two?" He said looking at Eli.

"Yea, I'm good." He said with a chuckle.

"Hey man…" Juice said as his voice faded and he slipped out the back door to take the call.

Tara signed heavily and shook her head at Gemma in disgust. She turned to head to the living room, nearly pushing Eli out of the way. He followed her anyway.

"Dr. Knowles, do you intend to press charges again Gemma?" Eli said, looking at her with concern and worry. Slowly pacing back and forth, Tara scoffed at the idea.

"No, I do not Sheriff. This is a family problem. Jax and I will handle it." She said sternly, continuing her pace.

"I understand." He said, nodding.

Gemma eventually collapsed into a chair barely able to hold her head up, trying to keep her sobs silent from Eli and Tara in the next room. _Oh God, what have I done_? Gemma thought. She closed her eyes and reflected back on her intentions of showing up at Jax's that night. _Kill that rat bitch. It's about protecting Jax. I'd do anything to protect my family_. Before she could continue to process through her thoughts, Juice was back in the kitchen. She quickly wiped away the tears that slipped out.

"Jax is on his-" The motorcycles were revving in front of the house before he could finish.

"Oh, shit." Gemma sighed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay friends, here's chapter 2! I'm really happy with how this chapter turned out. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did. Please leave any comments, feedback (good and bad), and suggestions. I can't wait for you all to embark on this love journey with me :)**

 **Chapter 2**

Jax sped his bike up the drive way and slammed on the brakes making the tires squeal as he came to a stop. He damn near ripped his helmet off and slung it on his bike and sprinted to the front door as Chibs pulled in. He swung the front door open scanning the house for Tara. When their eyes met, she was sitting on the couch with an ice pack to her cheek. Their eyes locked for what felt like a lifetime. Before Tara could blink, Jax was bent down in front of her, their eyes still locked. He reached for her free hand, lacing their fingers and squeezing it tight.

"Tara, what happened?" He said in his gruff voice. A part of Tara wanted to pull her hand away from him, but she couldn't. She still wasn't over what he did with _her_. _Collette_. She cringed at the mere thought of her name. That was still an issue she felt like needed to be addressed. But not now.

"Well, I walked in and your mother was stumbling around in the kitchen, clearly high and drunk out of her mind. She reeked of booze. Then, she just came at me, guns blazing. And now I have this. She pulled away the ice pack from her face. Her cheek was puffed out enough to swell her eye, and it was turning a nice shade of purple. "This is about her seeing our babies." Tara could see the the frustration and anger building in Jax's face as he squeezed her hand tighter. He bit him bottom lip and shook his head.

"Babe, I am so sorry this happened to you. I don't know what the hell has gotten into her, but I will handle it." He gently ran his finger tips across her swollen cheek, which made her flinch away from his touch. She could still feel the burning and throbbing.

" _We_ will handle it." Tara hissed back at him placing the ice pack back on her face. She wasn't sure how yet, but Gemma would be dealt with soon. Jax looked at her with his soft eyes, caressing her fingers slowly. He was making her melt all over again.

"Alright babe. Let me go have a word with my mother." He said stiffly. "I'll have Chibs give her a lift home." As he stood, he kissed Tara's forehead and whispered, "I love you."

Tara felt her heart nearly skip a beat at his words. She could feel her stomach fluttering up to her throat and her heart begin to pound. It was hard to believe he could still affect her this way after all they'd been through together.

"I love you, Jackson." Tara whispered back, giving his hand a squeeze as they let their fingers unlink slowly. He walked towards the kitchen, eyes still locked on Tara's until he reached Gemma at the table. Tara let out a huge sigh, feeling the flutters in her stomach begin to subside and her heart rate slow down.

Jax looked over his mom, scrunching his eyebrows while sliding his clenched fists in his pocket. He couldn't believe her. She was drinking some water given to her by Juice, who was leaning against the counter. Eli had managed to slip out the back and was talking to Chibs about what had gone on. Gemma finally looked up at Jax, feeling ashamed and anguished by her actions. Her eyes were full of sorrow and regret, he could see that, but at this point, he didn't give a shit.

"Can I please have a word with you? Outside. Now." Jax demanded. Gemma nodded almost immediately. She quickly rummaged through her purse on the table for her cigarettes for a few seconds, scoffing heavily when she couldn't find them.

"I've got plenty, mom." He flashed her an almost full pack. "Let's go." Jax said as he stepped back and gestured for Gemma to lead the way outside. She tried to gather her thoughts with one last deep breath. Then she started towards the front door. Jax motioned Juice to the living room as he followed his mother outside.

"Stay with her." He said firmly.

"Sure thing boss." Juice said making his way to Tara on the couch.

Gemma glanced at Tara as she passed the living room. She was reclined back on the couch with her eyes closed. Gemma saw her face for the first time. She grimaced at the look of it, but kept walking. Stepping on the porch, she lost what little balance she had left, falling backward into Jax. He caught her swiftly and helped her back onto both feet. Once she was stable, Jax made his way around her, standing directly in front of her, his eyes fueling with anger.

"Are you out of your god damn mind?! What the hell is wrong with you, mom? I mean look at you." Jax shouted at her. He ran his hands through his hair, pacing on the sidewalk.

His words stung worse than Gemma expected them to. She knew she'd fucked up. "I know this looks bad Jackson-" Gemma began pleading her case, but Jax cut off her excuse and lies before it could unfold.

"Don't even start! I don't wanna hear the excuses, mom. What goes on between Tara and I and our boys is our business. Stay out of it!" He said with a firm edge to his voice. His hand on his hips, he shook his head. "Look mom, there's a lot of shit going on right now. Shit that Tara and I are handling." He paused for a moment, reaching in his pack for two cigarettes. He handed one to Gemma. She hesitated, then reached for it and placed it between her lips. _This can't be good_ , she thought. Jax dug in his pocket for his lighter, lit his cigarette, and inhaled sharply, savoring each breath. He flicked the lighter again and held it up to Gemma's cigarette. She inhaled deeply, then let out a long breath, struggling to prepare herself for what was to come. Stuffing his lighter back in his pocket, Jax took another long draw before looking up at Gemma, uncertain of how his mother was going to handle this bomb shell.

"I made a deal with Paterson." He said, not taking his eyes off her. Gemma's face became hard as a rock. Her body became rigid and tight. He could see her clench her fists and jaw.

"That stupid little-" Gemma hissed through clenched teeth

"This is about protecting my family, mom!" He snapped at her, rage filled in his eyes and through his body, coursing through his veins. "I'm doing what you've taught me to do." He said trying to control his tone. He took another sharp inhale of his cigarette before continuing. "I'm turning myself in as the supplier for the KG-9 that killed four children in the school shooting. Just me. Not the club. All charges are being dropped against Tara. She is free to take our boys anywhere she wants." Jax paused, looking over his mother, trying to determine how she was taking all this in.

Gemma was speechless. She could feel the tears creeping up with a quickness. She couldn't stop them from falling. The lump began building in her throat. Her weed/alcohol concoction mixed with this news about her boys was a recipe for disaster. She plopped onto the front porch step, losing her cigarette along the way, buried her face in her hands, and began sobbing. _Oh God! My grandbabies and my baby boy being taken from me, all at once._

Jax rushed to her side. He bent down and wrapped his arms around her. Even after all the wreckage she had caused, Jax couldn't help the love he had for her. She was his mother.

"Mom, everything is going to be okay. I promise." He assured her. He gave her one last tight embrace before returning to his stance on the side walk. "This is the only way to keep Tara and my boys safe from the chaos." He said gruffly. "I'll still get visitation and the possibility of parole."

Deep down, Gemma knew this _was_ the only way. She didn't want to admit that though. After all the shit with Tara, the fake pregnancy, blaming her for the death of an unborn child. She recalled her and Tara's conversation after the truth was exposed. _Betrayal_. Something Gemma Teller had always ruled as unforgivable. From the looks of it, she thought Jax had forgiven Tara, but couldn't know for sure yet. She wiped away the tears quickly and regained her breath. She picked up her still burning cigarette off the ground with shaky hands and took a long, slow drag, closing her eyes and gradually feeling her body relax. She blew out the smoke and looked at her son, seeing his loving and broken eyes looking back at her, still not sure what to say.

"Mom, I love you. You know that." Jax said sincerely before taking another draw from his cigarette. As he blew out the smoke he continued, "What Tara did," he paused, trying to hold his composure for his mother's sake, "Terrible, fucked up shit. That is something we are still working through. But, I understand why she did it. She was only doing what she had seen from all of us. Protecting her family." Gemma understood what he was saying, however she still counldn't get over Tara blaming that shit on her. She let that go for now, but knew she'd have words with Tara about it later.

"I know, you're right." She began. "I guess I don't always think shit through before I do it. Impulsivity tends to get the best of me, always has." She paused, inhaling her cigarette then continued, "Guess some of what she did I can say she learned from me."

"Only the best of course." Jax said with a smirk starting at the edge of his lips, trying to get her to smile. Gemma reached and tried to smack him, but missed as he jumped backwards out of the way, causing her to form a half smile. "Hey." He said walking back towards to her. "With that being said, you have some shit to work through for yourself too." He paused, watching her facial expression go from playful to serious in an instant. "You have _got_ to cut back on the drinking and smoking, mom." He said, stifling his playfulness.

Gemma scoffed and rolled her eyes. As she opened her mouth to begin defending herself, Jax cut her off. "No you are not fine!" He said, raising his voice slightly. "You know I'm all about having a good time. But this shit is out of control, mom," he continued with concerned eyes. She knew she had been consuming a little more than usual lately, but with everything that had happened, she needed some kind of release.

"Look." he began, taking one last hit of his cigarette before tossing it. Gemma did the same while standing back up, surprisingly not needing a helping hand. Somehow it seemed this conversation was a total buzz kill for her. "Just get your shit together. Take a break from all the recreational stuff. Get out of town with Nero for a while. Clear your head. Tara and I are working through things. If you can keep it together, I can probably convince her to let you see the boys. But it's going to take time and effort, mom."

Gemma nodded. This is the only option she has right now. Yea. Okay." She said calmly. "But what about you, Jackson?" She could feel the tears filling her eyes once more. Jax could see her concern and worry. He walked up to her and hugged her tightly. She wrapper her arms around him, unable to return the hug completely.

"I'll be fine." He whispered, keeping his arms around her. "Tara will keep you updated on everything. I love you so much." He pulled back and placed his hands on her arms, kissing her on the cheek. "Chibs will give you a ride home. Take care of yourself mom." He said before making his way back into the house.

I love you too, baby." She replied softly. Gemma was still upset as she headed towards the driveway, but knew at this point keeping Jax happy was the best thing. Chibs came around from the back of the house and met her there. "Hey there darling. You doing okay?" He asked, wrapping his arm around her shoulder as they continued down the driveway.

"Oh yea, sweetheart. I'm good" She replied giving a closed smile. Chibs returned the smile as they approached his bike. He handed her a helmet while grabbing his. Jax watched from the front door as Gemma climbed onto the bike and Chibs started the engine. Their eyes locked one last time before Chibs pulled off. _Goodbye son_ , Gemma thought as the tears began falling once again.

Jax turned to go back into the house shutting the door behind him. Tara was still reclined on the couch with the ice pack resting on her cheek. He walker over and sat down next to her. Her breathing was a little heavy. _She must have dozed off_ , he thought. He pulled the ice pack away and studied her face. Still red and swollen. He could see the bruise forming, starting from her temple and running down to her cheek and even under her eye. His jaw tightened as he squinted his eyes in frustration. He ran his finger tips slowly down her jaw line, stopping at her chin. He ran his thumb gently along her bottom lip. Still cupping her chin, he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers softly. He felt a rush of relief over his body.

As Tara came to, she felt the familiar lips and touch of the man she had always been comforted by. The flutter in her stomach returned along with her racing heart beat. She reached up and ran her fingers through his hair as he kissed her slowly, deeply. He cupped her face in his hand, careful not to get close to the bruise. As their lips parted, he gave a nibble to her bottom lip, causing them both to smile. Their eyes finally met. They were close enough to each other's staggered breathing. They stared intensely at each other. His deep blue eyes, her soft green eyes. They were a burning fire together. Even after all the bullshit they'd been through and put each other through, they still couldn't get enough of each other.

"Do you think we'll make it through this?" She whispered, her eyes full of fear and worry. Jax sat them both up, never taking his eyes off her. Keeping one hand on her cheek, he grabbed her hand with the other and squeezed it tightly. He kissed her again, hard and deep this time. Tara could feel herself melting under his touch. A small moan escaped from between her lips as they parted again, their noses still touching.

"Babe, as long as we are together, we can make it thought anything. Just like we always have." Jax whispered back, taking another nibble at her lip. Tara nodded. She thought back for a moment on all that had recently happened. She knew she had tried to do the right thing, but guilt still twister her up on how she had hurt Jax, but how he had hurt her too. It made her body shutter, her face growing hard. Jax quickly picked up it. "You okay, babe?"

She snapped out of her flash back, returning to his concerned eyes, which were bluer than ever. "Oh yea I'm fine. Just a lot to take in. All of this. And we still have so much to-" Jax cut her off there.

"I know, to talk about. I couldn't agree more." He replied gruffly intertwining their fingers together. "Maybe we could start now?" He offered genuinely. "Patterson won't be here for at least another hour or more." Tara squeezed his hand and smiled with relief. The fact he actually wanted to work through stuff made her feel _so_ good, physically and mentally. Jax smirked his pretty boy smile that she couldn't resist.

"Yea, I'd like that." She replied, still smiling.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey everyone! Sorry for the long delay with this chapter. Work and my personal life has kept me pretty busy lately. I really enjoyed writing this chapter and am pretty happy with how it turned out. But as always, I appreciate any feedback or suggestions. I can't wait to see where this story leads to for Jax and Tara. I just love them both so much. Enjoy :)**

 **Chapter 3**

Still staring into each others eyes intensely, they both heard footsteps approaching them from the kitchen. Nearly forgetting that Juice and Eli were still there, Jax and Tara jumped up from the couch, almost simultaneously. Dreading taking his eyes away from her, Jax turned and headed towards the kitchen still intertwined in Tara's fingers. She followed him, holding his hand tightly. As they were walking, she could feel the .38 moving around her waist band. _Shit_ , she thought, slightly rolling her eyes. As they made it to the kitchen, they met Eli at the doorway.

"Tara informed me that she would not be pressing charges against Gemma." He said, cautiously, looking at Jax.

"Yeah, this is a family issue. Tara and I are handling it." Jax replied as Tara squeezed his hand, reassuring him that he still had the possibility to repair his family.

"Understood. I'll be available if you need me." Eli said, nodding. He turned and headed out the back door. Juice was standing near the sink, worry and fear in his eyes. Tara wondered what that was about, but didn't fill her thoughts with it. She had much more pressing issues to deal with.

Jax turned to Tara, cupping his hands on her face, lightly stroking her cheek. She wanted so badly to wrap her arms around his waist, pull him close to her, and kiss him. She resisted the urge and settled for running her index finger through his beard, around his chin, feeling a smile form around the corner of his lips. He laid a soft kiss on her forehead before stepping back and sticking his hands in his pocket. Tara felt her stomach churn in frustration. She didn't want his hands to leave her body, but couldn't bring herself to let him know that, yet.

"Can you give me and Juice a minute, babe?" He said, his soft blue eyes glistening in the evening sunlight that was shining through the kitchen window.

She smiled slightly trying not to reveal how much she couldn't resist him. "Yea, sure." She replied quickly, trying hard not let her emotions seep through. "I'll just be in the bedroom putting some things away." Giving him one last glance, she headed back to the bedroom. Jax tried to read her facial expression but couldn't.

Wanting to run to the bedroom to Tara, he turned back to Juice, who was fidgety and looked anxious. Jax wasn't sure how he could come back from this. Juice had betrayed him and the club. He narrowed his eyes at Juice, still feeling the anger churning in the pit of his stomach.

"Juice, I'm not sure where you and I go from here." Jax said, crossing his arms and scrunching his eyebrows. "We gotta take this to the table. Let the club decide."

Juice eyes grew big with fear and panic. _Oh shit_ , he thought. His heart rate picked up immensely, feeling as though it could come right through his chest. He nodded his head quickly, avoiding eye contact. He could feel the tears forming in his eyes as Jax stared him down.

"Yea, you're right." Juice replied, failing to control his staggered breathing. Unable to contain the tears any longer, he dropped his head in defeat and let them flood out. Jax didn't know what to say or how to react. He closed his eyes and clenched his jaw, trying to tame his anger inside.

"You'll be able to plead your case. The vote'll happen tomorrow night at church. Chibs and Bobby are up to speed on everything." Jax said, finally breaking the awkward silence. Looking up, Juice shook his head in understanding and headed out the front door.

Jax shut and locked the door behind him. Before heading back to the bedroom, he leaned back against the door, exhaling deeply, his mind racing, Running his fingers through his hair, he headed back to the bedroom. His heart rate picked up quickly and his stomach began to flutter, which was unusual for him, but he knew only one person could twist him up this way.

Once at the door way, Jax stopped for a moment, his eyes glued to Tara. She hadn't noticed him yet. She was putting clothes away at the dresser. After shutting the dresser drawer, she reached back into her waist band and pulled out the .38, laying it on the dresser. She started at it for a moment, wondering what would have happened if she'd grabbed it in the kitchen with Gemma. Pausing her thoughts, she let out a heavy sigh, dropping her head and closing her eyes. _What have I done to her?_ , he thought hopelessly. Finally looking up, her eyes met Jax's, which had shifted to a darker blue, looking scared and discouraged. They both headed towards each other almost simultaneously, stopping just close enough to touch one another, their eyes still locked.

"Sit down." Tara whispered, motioning towards the bed. Jax grabbed her hand and led the way. Sitting in silence, intertwining their fingers, they were both at loss of where to even start. Unable to stand the quiet any longer, Tara gathered her thoughts as best she could.

"I know that saying sorry doesn't begin to touch what you're feeling, Jax. I just kept thinking about something you'd said to me before." She paused, staring into his confused eyes, taking both of his hands in hers before continuing. "About loving something so much, you'd do anything to protect it, no matter the cost or damage it caused. That's what I feel for our boys..." She said trailing off and her voice cracking. She could feel the lump building in her throat as the tears started streaming.

Jax wrapped her up in his arms and she buried her face in his chest. She didn't realize how much she missed the smell of his leather and cigarettes. She wrapped her arms around him, pulling him closer, curling up in his lap. He held her tight, running his fingers through her hair, slowly rocking her back and forth as she sobbed quietly. Jax could feel the pain and guilt that Tara was consumed with. He felt himself begin to unravel. His stomach was twisted up, his hands shaky and sweating.

He lifted Tara's head to meet his eyes, wiping the tears from her cheek with his thumb. He sat her next him, keeping his hands around her face. "I understand why you did what you did, Tara. I can look past it." He paused, biting at the corner of his bottom lip. Tara felt the relief rush over her body, her breath finally catching.

"Really?" She replied, the tears slowly subsiding.

"Yes, really." Hating to take his hands off her, he paused and grabbed a joint from his cigarette pack, lit it and inhaled deeply. "But, I need to be able to trust you, Tara. Know that you're not just gonna disappear with the boys. I can't go through that shit again." He said, taking another hit of the joint.

Trying to tame her frustration, Tara nodded quickly. _You_ _wanna talk to me about trust?_ , she thought. "Yes of course, Jax. I never wanted to keep them from you or hurt you. We will visit and call ad much as we can." She said as nicely and sincerely as she could manage. A smile formed at the corner of Jax's lips. He liked hearing her say _we_.

Unable to stand it any longer, Tara stood up and took the joint from between Jax's fingers. She walked to the dress and turned to face him, taking a long drag. Still half way smiling, he studied her body for a moment, taking in every curve from head to toe. _God damn, I love her_.

"On the issue of trust..." She began abruptly hitting the joint again, snapping him out of his daydream. "This mommy fetish thing-"

"That is not what this was, Tara." He said defensively, standing up in front of her.

"Well, it's definitely not trust, Jax." She spat back angrily, her voice growing louder. She crossed her arms, hitting the joint one last time before handing it back. "Seeing you like that brought back so many emotions for me. Shit that I thought we were done with. Sickening doesn't even begin to cover how that felt." She pushed passed him walking back to the bed to sit down. Jax hit the joint long and hard, holding it in as long as he could, trying to find the right words.

Exhaling, he put the joint out in the ashtray on the dresser and walked over to Tara. As he sat down, he could see the sadness in her eyes as she stared blankly at the wall. The guilt and remorse he felt inside was twisting him up. He knew this was exactly how Tara felt through the fake pregnancy. Unfortunately, Jax had opened up an old wound, and was willing to do whatever he had to to fix it.

"I never wanted to hurt you either, Tara." He started in his low, gruff voice. "You pushed me away. Totally shut me out. I felt so alone and distant from you. I was lost. So I did what I always do. I turned to a club solution." He cupped her face in his hands, looking deeply into her eyes. "I'm so sorry for the wreckage I've caused you. Our family. I know I can't take it back, but I want to make it better." Jax could see the tears forming in her eyes. For once, they both understood how the other was feeling.

He leaned in and pushed his lips against hers, tangling his fingers in her hair, tugging at her locks ever so slightly. Tara pressed herself into him, running her fingers up his cut, wrapping them around his neck. Their lips moved together in synchrony, parting just enough to get a taste of each other.

Before things got too intense and as much as she didn't want to, Tara cupped Jax's face in her hands and pulled him away just enough to see his eyes. "I'm so sorry too, Jax." She whimpered quietly against his lips. "I was so broken over the Otto thing. I knew you'd never let me leave with the boys. And with everything happening with the club, I knew you couldn't or wouldn't walk away."

"I know, babe." He whispered, caressing her cheek with his thumb. "It's okay. I forgive you. You don't have to run anymore. You and the boys will be safe now." Jax replied, running his lips over hers, slowly. "I love you, Tara. I always will."

"I love you too, Jackson. Forever and always. I'm here, baby." She muttered softly against him. Their lips met again, this time deep and intensely, their tongues swirling together rhythmically. His hands were once again fisted in her hair, tugging a little harder this time. Taking him by his cut, Tara yanked him closer to her, pulling him on top of her as she laid back on the bed. Jax pushed himself onto her, his erection growing quickly, pressing against her stomach.

His finger tips traveled slowly from her hair down her neck to her chest, cupping her breast in his hand, squeezing it softly. She let out a low growling moan into his mouth, feeling herself becoming wetter by the minute. She began kissing along his jaw, sending goose bumps down his body, causing him to shiver. When she reached his ear, she slipped his earlobe between her teeth, nibbling softly. He squeezed her again, tighter this time, feeling her nipples becoming hard. "Damn babe, I've missed you so much." He whispered gruffly against her neck, a smirk forming on his face. He could feel a smile from her lips around his ear as she let out a giggle.  
Finding her lips again, Jax slid his tongue between them, pressing himself into her. Their tongues danced together once more, taking in the sweet taste of each other they both missed so much. Tara ran her fingers through his hair, feeling his throbbing cock grinding into her. She was nearly dripping in her panties.

With staggered breathing, she parted their lips and mouthed the two words he'd been dying to hear her say. "Love me."


End file.
